Want to improve your relationship with your loved ones and most importantly, yourself?

Dr. Payal Patel Ghayal is Certified Life and Parent Coach for women physicians and an Integrative Pediatrician. She helps women to start advocating for themselves, and experience greater fulfillment and happiness.

It’s been rough soccer season for my nine year old. There were lots of tears and a ton whining. It was his first time playing since he was in preschool.

I guess it didn’t help that his dad was asked to be assistant coach because someone quit.

Whenever he wasn’t playing the way he “should” be performing, he started having the same recurring thoughts.

๐ˆ’๐ฆ ๐ง๐จ๐ญ ๐ ๐จ๐จ๐ ๐ž๐ง๐จ๐ฎ๐ ๐ก.

๐„๐ฏ๐ž๐ซ๐ฒ๐จ๐ง๐ž ๐ข๐ฌ ๐›๐ž๐ญ๐ญ๐ž๐ซ ๐ญ๐ก๐š๐ง ๐ฆ๐ž.

๐ˆ’๐ฆ ๐ง๐จ๐ญ ๐ ๐จ๐ข๐ง๐  ๐ญ๐จ ๐ ๐ž๐ญ ๐›๐ž๐ญ๐ญ๐ž๐ซ ๐ž๐ฏ๐ž๐ง ๐ข๐Ÿ ๐ˆ ๐ญ๐ซ๐ฒ.

This was very hard for me to see, especially as a mom, pediatrician and coach.

It was also a challenge because I am innately so different from him. I was brought up to be competitive, never give up and encourage myself continuously. More importantly, I could never accept failure.

That was obviously taken to the extreme and finally landed me in the mindset work that I use on myself and my clients.

๐‘ป๐’‰๐’† ๐’„๐’‰๐’Š๐’๐’… ๐’•๐’‰๐’‚๐’• ๐’Š๐’” ๐’…๐’Š๐’‡๐’‡๐’†๐’“๐’†๐’๐’• ๐’‡๐’“๐’๐’Ž ๐’š๐’๐’– ๐’Š๐’” ๐’•๐’‰๐’† ๐’Ž๐’๐’”๐’• ๐’„๐’‰๐’‚๐’๐’๐’†๐’๐’ˆ๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ ๐’•๐’ ๐’‘๐’‚๐’“๐’†๐’๐’•.

After a lot of tension between my husband and I about how to manage his soccer experience, I decided to just give unconditional love and support.

1. I would tell him what he did right every game.

2. I showed up to cheer and guide him from the sidelines ( despite not ever playing soccer)

3. I listened whenever he was willing to share without interrupting.

4. I allowed him to have ALL the feelings (it wasn’t always easy)

When emotions weren’t high, I coach him on the power of our thoughts to create any result in our life. Of course, I used age appropriate lingo.

5. I stopped myself when I realized I nagging and lecturing. That NEVER works.

6. I let go of the Asian tiger mom cape

7. Lastly, I was ok with having a different parenting style than my husband. I didn’t judge myself when I tried to overcompensate when my husband showed up as his authentic self.

We lost the quarterfinals and all felt a little sad for different reasons.

My son cried because he never scored a goal.

My husband was upset because the kids made lots of silly mistakes.

I was sad because I wanted my son to have some happy memories of soccer.

It’s all OK!

๐‘ช๐’‚๐’ ๐’˜๐’† ๐’ƒ๐’† ๐’๐’Œ ๐’˜๐’Š๐’•๐’‰ ๐’๐’Š๐’‡๐’† ๐’๐’๐’• ๐’‡๐’†๐’†๐’๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ ๐’ˆ๐’๐’๐’… ๐’‚๐’๐’ ๐’•๐’‰๐’† ๐’•๐’Š๐’Ž๐’†?

๐‘ฐ๐’” ๐’Š๐’• ๐’๐’Œ ๐’•๐’ ๐’‰๐’‚๐’—๐’† ๐’‚ ๐’…๐’Š๐’‡๐’‡๐’†๐’“๐’†๐’๐’• ๐’‘๐’‚๐’“๐’†๐’๐’•๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ ๐’”๐’•๐’š๐’๐’† ๐’•๐’‰๐’‚๐’ ๐’š๐’๐’–๐’“ ๐’‘๐’‚๐’“๐’†๐’๐’•๐’” ๐’๐’“ ๐’”๐’‘๐’๐’–๐’”๐’†?

๐‘พ๐’‚๐’๐’• ๐’•๐’ ๐’Š๐’Ž๐’‘๐’“๐’๐’—๐’† ๐’š๐’๐’–๐’“ ๐’“๐’†๐’๐’‚๐’•๐’Š๐’๐’๐’”๐’‰๐’Š๐’‘ ๐’˜๐’Š๐’•๐’‰ ๐’š๐’๐’–๐’“ ๐’๐’๐’—๐’†๐’… ๐’๐’๐’†๐’” ๐’‚๐’๐’… ๐’Ž๐’๐’”๐’• ๐’Š๐’Ž๐’‘๐’๐’“๐’•๐’‚๐’๐’•๐’๐’š ๐’š๐’๐’–๐’“๐’”๐’†๐’๐’‡?

Anything is possible.

I always say- if I can do it, so can you!




Hey, if youโ€™re ready to advocate for yourself and listen to your inner voice so you can live in freedom, wake up everyday with purpose and enjoy your work and family.

Check out my program here for more information on my 1:1 coaching.

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