You’ve Probably Been Doing This For Yourself But Haven’t Realized Was Self-Care…

Dr. Payal Patel Ghayal is Certified Life and Parent Coach for women physicians and an Integrative Pediatrician. She helps women to start advocating for themselves, and experience greater fulfillment and happiness.


What’s the Google definition of Gratitude?

The quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

It’s easy for us to show gratitude to others when they show kindness to us.

Saying “thank you”

Please show gratitude at work or with colleagues.

Even to our children.

I always show gratitude to my Starbucks Barista.

(And if you know me, you know, I don’t order coffee or tea, I order hot chocolate)

Being grateful comes up quite easily.

I realized after being anxious for a few weeks and getting coaching…that I felt I could do better or wasn’t doing enough.

I wasn’t thanking myself.

In my house, I have this transition to ask my kids:

  1. What was the sunshine in your day?
  2. What was the cloud in your day?
  3. And what do you want to pray for?

(The sunshine was not my idea it was one of my nannies that gave me the idea).
The kids always share. Most of the time it’s the last thing that just happened.

But what I noticed is, I don’t do that for me.

I don’t share what my sunshine, cloud, and what I want to pray for.

And it’s usually because I’m trying to get through bedtime…start my me time (which usually starts around 8ish)

The biggest struggle for me was not already seeing what I was doing and believing.

I wasn’t acknowledging the things I already do.

I want you to notice or write down, how you already are taking care of yourself.

When we throw the word around “self-care” and we are trying to think of how we do that…

We think we need to come up with these big things.

Obvious gestures we made to ourselves.

A weekend getaway
A spa day
A gift

In reality, if we look at our day…

There are things we are already doing for ourselves and just spelling that out for ourselves…

Accepting and understanding we are already doing something.

Can already create a shift.

In my day, one of the things I value is a quiet breakfast.

I’ve created a routine for myself, where even if I do my morning client coaching sessions which are usually at 6:15.

I will take a break. Drop the kids off. Pick up a warm cup of Starbucks Grande, even if it’s hot outside.

I love that I do that for myself because it’s some kind of routine and when I go to Starbucks, they already know me. We have time where we greet each other.

We catch up on whatever has happened since I’ve seen them.

I give myself time to connect.

Connect with a friend. We kinda just share when we both are having our breakfast.

I feel so good and so set for the day when I do this.

I don’t really think about it as self-care or something I thank myself for.

BUT…it’s a big deal.

I noticed when my friend was out of the country and I didn’t have this daily routine, I didn’t have connection, I didn’t have an outlet…

I know I crave that connection. That quiet time.

That’s one thing I didn’t notice I was doing for myself.

The other thing is, I work out, usually 3 times a week at least.

I block my schedule in the day to be able to make it to specific classes at our local gym.

I love going.

On my own, I had 0 motivation to try to make myself work out.

I’ll do it, but I don’t enjoy it.

There’s something about being in the class with other people who are also excited to be there.

These women also work, but they block this time into their schedules to be able to make it to these classes.

I never think about it as “I’m taking care of me”.

Or give myself cudos for showing up.

But I did today.

I showed up for myself.

I knew my body would appreciate it afterward.

That’s another way I did something for myself that I do not always acknowledge as gratitude.

Where in your life are you not showing gratitude to you?

I did some reading on the science of gratitude and here’s what I learned:

In positive psychology research, it says:

Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.

That’s pretty powerful.

Why not now?

Put a reminder on your phone.

Write it in a book

Talk it out with the kids…

There’s so many ways that I can do this.

One of the biggest things I’ve done for myself is taking a chance on me.

Doing something that improves my quality of life.

I hope you take time out to show what you’re grateful for to yourself.

Write it.

Say it.

Do whatever it takes.

The most important relationship we have is the one with ourselves.


Hey, if you’re ready to advocate for yourself and listen to your inner voice so you can live in freedom, wake up everyday with purpose and enjoy your work and family. Check out my program here for more information on my 1:1 coaching.


Hey, if you’re ready to advocate for yourself and listen to your inner voice so you can live in freedom, wake up everyday with purpose and enjoy your work and family.

Check out my program here for more information on my 1:1 coaching.

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